It’s movie review day here at Glitter, Bliss, and Perfect Chaos. I’m super excited about today’s movie, Abduction, starring Taylor Lautner. Lily Collins, daughter of musician Phil Collins plays his love interest.
I read a review about this movie and they thought it lacked plot, had a poorly written script filled with clichés, and had uninspired acting. I figure it’s got three things we love here at Glitter, Bliss, and Perfect Chaos. Hot shirtless man + dangerous action + romance. I’m thinking I will like it.
Here’s the trailer.
The Verdict: Well first of all, for those of you hoping, Taylor is not shirtless in this movie. Bummer. I know, I know, he’s trying to get away from being Jacob, but him shirtless is why so many of us switched from Team Edward to Team Jacob. There is one brief part where he’s shirtless, but you really only see his back. Then he does a quick shirt change, but that really doesn’t count. The ab sightings were zero. I think there’s one team we can all agree on when it comes to Taylor. That would be TEAM NO SHIRT!
So I was slightly disappointed in that. Also if you watch the movie trailer, you see him give the love interest a really hot kiss in a train. After watching him struggle to be with Bella for so many years, I was ready for him to have some sexytimes of his own, ya know?And this scene was hot. They had crushed on each other for like years, they watched people being killed, they are on the run, worried they won’t make it another day. They kiss, he picks her up and slams her against the wall, kissing her and then……..um, nothing. She says she needs food. I’m sorry, but this is clearly not realistic movie making!! I know they were in high school, but they almost died!! And they didn’t need to show it happen because of the PG-13 rating, but they still should have done it. A guy that hot has you up against the wall. He’s kissing you after the huge adrenaline rush you’ve both had. Trust me, food is gonna be the last thing on your mind. That’s why the saying Living on Love is so popular. Sex over food.
Oh also, there’s a scene where it shows him at what is supposed to be his wrestling match, but he wears workout shorts and a shirt with the arms cut out. Where are the singlets?
Okay, so I’m moving on. The movie was pretty good. Taylor can actually act. The love between him and Lily Collins was sweet and believable. (Although, if Taylor went to my high school, he would have been the hottest guy there, not just some guy with no girlfriend, but I digress.) The movie was a bit slow in a few places, but overall I enjoyed it. Will it be a critical success? Probably not. But as we know, I go to a movie for one reason, and that is to be entertained. And I was entertained.
I saw him at a party, dumped my loser boyfriend for him, and we went on an adrenaline filled adventure together. I almost got killed a few times, but it was worth it for that one kiss on the train. Although, in my fantasy, we totally got busy before we got hungry. And now that we’ve gotten the bad guys, I’m really hoping we stay together. But it’s hard to tell. It may have been just a Hookup.
Just a reminder of how we rank movies here at Glitter, Bliss, and Perfect Chaos:
One Star = Walk of shame. I was in last night’s dress, carrying my shoes as I rushed off. I can’t believe I wasted my time on him and pray no one I know sees me.
Two Stars = Bad date. He didn’t really do anything wrong, we just didn’t have any chemistry. Maybe he just wasn’t my type. I probably won’t answer if he calls.
Three Stars =Hookup. We had a great night together. Don’t know if it will be more than that, but it was sure fun while it lasted.
Four Stars = Stalking him. What a night! We danced, we kissed. Now if I could just get him to call me.
Five Stars = Happily ever after. I love him! I want to marry him, have his babies, and live happily ever after.